Well today marks the weekend of 'Spring Cleaning '. Yeah, I know Spring is over, but in my world NOW is the time to begin ending my hermiterbination. The weather is about to be better, school's back, and soon it'll been time for more Rituxan! I cannot wait for this summer to end.
Saturday was rough, though. My wife started and will finish her project of making new bunk beds for Raelin and Saoirse. She's awesome, but at the same time I cannot help but to feel worse. My wife is busting her self on a construction project, and I can barely make it to the restroom to avoid messing myself like two year old baby. Every time I hear the saw, drill, or hammer it constantly resonates in my head, "LOSER!" But, then again I also have done the dishes, am getting ready to prep the four year old for bed, and then maybe I can figure out how best to mop the kitchen floor. Is it cool, fun, or entertaining? NO! But it is something. I am still trying, succeeding, and, of course, failing. But at least I am doing something.
So, what next? There a few options that I see. First, I can quit this blog, saving myself some anxiety. Second, I can implement an attempt to increase how often I post here, thinking that people actually read it. 😀 Lastly, I can change nothing and enjoy the stagnation. I guess my end result will become apparent within the coming few days. Blogging is A LOT more exhausting than I expected.
I've also caught myself thinking about returning to work. I've looked at several types of stay at home jobs: call service, tutoring, and others. I am just not sure if I have the ability to stick with a schedule. I think I am going to try, but I just don't know if I want it badly enough to force myself to do it.
But, I still hold to my motto: the only true optimist is the pessimist. I really do no longer hope for the best, but rather, I expect the worst. My expectations not being met is my goal. :)
On a lighter note, football is just around the corner, and my Steelers are looking good.
How I deal with life and family as I maneuver through this MesS also known as Multiple Sclerosis.
Saturday, August 12, 2017
End Of "Hermiterbination."
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